The Most Amazing Woman I know...

I have met many people in my life. Not because I was popular... We moved around a bit. So I know about having to start anew and about ending things pretty well.

Most relationships have been seasonal, so you could say I got used to not having much consistency in that particular department. I have my reservations about the title "Best-Friend" as the only consistent relationship in my life has been Jesus. But without diving into an entire dramatic scene - it's a happy story and I certainly wouldn't change a thing.

The next couple of blogs will be about honoring people. People who have played a significant - often life changing role, in my life... Those who have stayed long, and those who rented a space for a season. It could take me a while to get through all the people and encounters I have had. So bear with me on this one. Every story, is from my own personal perspective...

MY MOM:

My mom is one of the most amazing people I know. She was the one who taught me about Jesus and because of her, I got born again. She taught us one Sunday at Sunday school about asking Jesus to live in our hearts. I was about 5 or 6 yrs old. I ran through the house and into my room where I knelt down and asked Jesus to come live in my heart. I will never forget that day - it was such a beautiful, private moment with God, just like most other beautiful moments with Him.

My Mom and I at Starbucks near Weybridge, Surrey - December 2013

I admire her strength and courage in every adversity she has ever faced. She was 31 when my dad suddenly passed away from a heart attack. That's my age now. I can't even imagine having to experience this heartache and then to still take care of my two children - Emil was 7 and I had just turned 10. My dad had only been gone for 7 months when she married again - I sometimes try put myself in her shoes to try and figure out if that was even enough time for her to deal with everything and to heal completely. She was so brave to move on and to dare to dream of a new life. I know it wasn't easy for her... Starting a brand new life with my brother and I - and a new head of the home. I often cried for her and prayed for her asking God to heal every heart-ache she had cause I knew I didn't have the power to make it better. I still often encounter these moments - and they do break my heart. But God has reassured me that He can be trusted to take care of her.

"I think it takes a woman of great courage to pack what she can in the suitcases she has, leave her two oldest children behind, buy a one way ticket for her and her 3 little children, and set up a new life with my dad in a country she has never set foot on."

God is so incredibly generous. My mom had three more children in her 40s. Ruth (now 15), Andrew (now 13) and Eleia (now 10). There is a gap of 21yrs between Eleia and I - and I LOVE being a big sister! 

Dad, Eleia, Mom, Ruthie and Andie - Windsor Castle - December 2013

My little brother (Andrew) is one of the most loving children I know. He was the second of the three little ones. But he also very misunderstood as he has ADHD and Aspergers (Autism). We only learned this when he was around 7+yrs old. My mom has been so great with him even though I know it's tough for her. I am sure she may even have had moments where she felt like she had failed him. But looking from the outside in - I'd like to reassure her over and over again - she is the perfect mom!

Just like a child who is different gets rejected in society, so a mother gets rejected too - most people (even-though they wont say it out loud) think she doesn't discipline her child or cannot seem to manage his "naughty" behaviour. It seems unfair considering the circumstances are out of her and most often even his control... I cannot imagine how lonely it must sometimes get for her.

Mom and Andie - just the other day...

See - this right here is the highlight of who she is... In the midst of having to deal with so much - she works full time for a company called THE WHITE LODGE where she takes care of other disabled children with disabilities such as, Cerebal Palsy, Autism, Retts, Hyperactivity and children with muscular conditions. She often works right through the night assisting families with their children. Some of these shifts are scary and emotional as some of the children have severe seizures or epileptic fits. And yet, every time she gets home, she has a grateful heart. Never negative about her circumstances, always moving forward, always positive, speaking with such passion about the child whom she just looked after and what a joy they bring to her... 

God has opened such amazing doors for my mom to help other moms and dads who struggle to deal with a special needs child. I love that. He has called her to bring HOPE and healing to families through her hurt and experiences. Those are often the best places to come from if you wanna help someone - a place you've been or even are in yourself.

My mom is my hero. :) And I love her with all the loves I have in my heart.

God's Word on it:

"Honor your father and mother"--which is the first commandment with a promise-- "so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth." Ephesians 6:2-3

Perfect Love

I have been meditating on the scripture from 1 John 4:18 over the past week. A scripture that I have heard many times before but had literally only just came alive to me now.

“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear,

because fear has to do with punishment.

The one who fears is not made perfect in love.”

I have spent most of my life riddled with fears. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, disappointing both people and God, fear of missing it, fear of being derailed from God’s calling on my life, fear of being inadequate, fear of messing up so bad that there cannot possibly be a second chance, fear that God wants something for me that I don’t want myself... and the list goes on. You can only imagine with this kind of war in my mind I certainly was bound to get no-where in life.

If I had just gotten the revelation that God is pleased with me no matter what I do I would have been in a more secure place long time ago. And yes, life would have perhaps been a different for me. But that’s just it. Even in the mess of life and wasted time because of lack of knowledge – there He stands - the proudest father. He looks at me and see’s perfection – not because of my perfection or my good behaviour, but because His love for me is perfect. It lacks nothing – it is sincere, its full, it’s complete. When I make mistakes – he does not bring out the big black book, he doesn't condemn me or try fix me. He simply loves me and reassures me that I am still perfect to Him. It’s this love that fixes us. It makes us respond to Him - not defend ourselves or our egos or slip into a depression about our inadequacies. It causes our hearts to desire Him more... because it’s a safe place to run. This is where we learn just how much we truly need Him. This is where we learn to draw from His Love. This is where we rely on His strength to lift us up.

What an amazing picture of his grace.

Madiba... Man of Wisdom

I was so inspired on a recent trip to Robben Island. I have wanted to visit there many times but I don’t think there has been a more perfect moment than now, while Madiba is in hospital.

You hear about the great things people do – but from a distance. We’ve only seen the end result of many years of struggle. But I am amazed at how God works. He is precise in his decision making and selection of those called according to HIS purpose. Whether you believe in God or that He has a purpose for you or not, He has anyway – because he loves us so much. What would our lives be like if we never had a purpose or dream – if we never had something bigger than us to move us forward?

I am no expert on Nelson Mandela, and I am really only on chapter 3 of his book, “Long Walk to Freedom”, but I caught a glimpse of his heart when we stopped the tour bus on Robben Island at the Limestone mine. My heart was moved as the tour guide spoke about certain events that took place right there at that mine.

Lime Stone Quarry on Robben Island

Madiba had much time to think – and he was certainly a man who was wise and thought in depth about many things regarding life. The part of the story that touched my heart so much was a very simple thing – but more powerful than anyone can ever put in words. It’s all about restoration, bringing people everywhere together, fighting for UNITY and healing.

Many of the Freedom fighters were against the whites completely and I can only assume that even though he wanted freedom like they did his heart was different. Madiba had seen things through his life, and I just feel in my heart that God led him through circumstances in life to equip him for the change he would make in South Africa – and the impact it would have on the world. Madiba did not stand for anything but to bring unity. He realized that the only way to bring change was to teach. So he started there, in prison, building relationships with the white officers/wardens – starting a revolution in Prison. There was much restoration that took place before he left prison. He knew that the white Afrikaner only acted the way they did because they were taught that way. He wanted to change their thinking and help teach them the right way. And he succeeded. That’s what made him so great… He brought everyone together – and for those who didn’t understand – he taught through his influence – he even encouraged his comrades to join him in being a positive influence.

Mandela with his Government of National Unity cabinet ministers 

- The Mandela government was a Government of National Unity and his cabinet included ministers from other political parties.

What a great example he is! Of how to bring unity – how to reach out a hand to those who do not understand, to help them cross over the boundaries of indifference and to be of the same mind and heart.

As a white South African I have been ashamed of my people’s behavior in the past – but I couldn’t be more proud of my parents who have brought me up to not see colour or treat people indifferently. I am so honoured to be a South African – to be part of a generation who didn’t grow up angry and hateful – who wasn’t brainwashed or influenced to see others as different.

Madiba! Our hero and great example! Thank-you for being such an amazing Role Model!

A God who makes dreams come true...

I remember when growing up having to do speeches for english or Afrikaans. I hated standing in front of the class and giving a speech because I lacked so much confidence and feared failure so badly. It was most certainly not my scene talking in front of people. There were times however we were asked to do speeches on what we'd like to become one day. Having attended 2 primary and 3 high-school's I got to deliver this special speech at least 5 times with all the confidence in the world because, since I was really young I always knew... "One day when I grow up I am gonna sing for Jesus". 

No one knew I could sing. I never entered competitions at school (until I was in matric where my mom and aunt entered me in one) nor took part in plays. My gift was for Jesus - and Jesus alone. My teachers must have thought... "Uuuhhhh Sure... This strange little girl, who smells funny wants to sing for Jesus... She has no confidence and she doesn't have what it takes!"  That may have been true, and in hind-sight may even have been wiser for me to take part in play or two to work the confidence a bit. But I suppose that's what makes this testimony a greater one. 

We always read in Habakuk 2:3 "for the vision is yet for an appointed time; But at the end it will speak, and it will not lie. Though it tarries, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry."

Ever since my first speech its been at least 25 years of more dreaming and more speaking. In my "waiting" I have been waiting forward... towards the dream without realizing it. I have written many songs... Over 50 have been recorded on voice notes to my phone. 

I have recently started recording my first album... I am so excited to see this dream come true. There were times I had wondered if it would even happen and for those close to me - they will know I have been talking about this for a number of years... I am sure they got tired hearing about it.

I find that most of the songs I had written are outdated and their season has come and gone... But they were excellent opportunities to craft the gift God has placed inside of me. I am realizing more and more that exercising the gifts God has given us behind closed doors where no man can praise the artist or his work is "waiting" on the fulfillment of the dream. Waiting (as in serving) is still a form of spending time yes? So I "waited" on God with my gift for many years... And the appointed time has come. 

I cannot wait to get these songs out there. My heart rejoices in God's faithfulness - I am in awe really at how things are coming together. The greatest prayer of my heart is that each song will touch somebody's heart the same way God has spoken to me through some of these... I am continually writing more and developing my style into the direction God will lead me into. But more than that... Cultivating a message deep in the heart of each song that sings of Jesus and who He is.... How he loves us... How he'll never disappoint us nor give on us!

May every soul that has ever doubted God's love for them be awakened to The extravagant dimensions of His love. May every wounded heart be rescued from its despair, every lost son and daughter be restored to God our Father who loves each and every single one of His creations so dearly.... That is my prayer for this entire world... And that's my heart for this album....

God does make our dreams come true... Because most of the time he has someone else in mind... Though it tarries... Wait for it... It's coming...

Green with Envy...?

I have really enjoyed Bible School this year. And I am so glad that I have been able to learn everything that I have learned.

Pastor Shaun has been teaching on a subject titled "financial fitness". And in this subject he covers envy. Initially I thought wow... Interesting perspective until I realized there was something in this teaching the Holy Spirit wanted me to see in a specific area of my life.

Envy can only take root in the heart of some one who has become ungrateful. We all start out being very grateful for everything in life. Grateful to have a bed to sleep in, grateful to have a nice warm house... Grateful for friends and family - and the list goes on. Until we see someone who has something we don't have and feel that we deserve to have that same thing too. Thats where the little seed of starts to grow... What should be a privilege becomes what we are "entitled to". And trust me... one sure negative sign is when you find yourself saying "but Lord, I have served you and honored you with my life...". I cannot even begin to tell you how many times I have pulled that stunt on God... And if there is something that God does not fall for its manipulation.

God would love to give us everything our hearts desire. If only we'd ask him. And perhaps before asking, consider our motive for wanting what we desire so badly to have. He knows us best and will give us only good gifts.

If you have a little "envy fever" and don't know how to stop that ugly green monster from rearing its head... make a nice long list of all you DO have and start with things like, eye sight, the ability to even hear sound. I have made a list... It really puts things in perspective... Plus... How many times would someone not desire what you have... So... Fully Enjoy what you have on behalf of others!

Memories... Canada 2012

Just a couple things from my trip to Canada in June last year - I'll be going back there this year - except for this time... in the Winter... If you ever go there, try some of these places and eats...

Ps... For those who wanna know places to shop at? I'll bring that info later...



Top Left hand corner is Taco Bell - loads of unhealthy stuff - if you google Taco Bell you'll find many people make fun of this place...

 




Road Signs and Street Names...



Niagara falls - Promenade



Niagara falls - Promenade



Harley Davidson & Guinness World of Records - Nagara Falls Promenade



SkyWheel at Niagara Falls Promenade

  

Madame Tussaud - Niagara Falls Promenade - Most probably the worst Madame Tussaud in the world - but still a fun experience



China Town - Toronto



China Town - Toronto



Underground Trains - Toronto



Toronto




Toronto



Toronto



Lake Champlain - it looks like an ocean - the locals call this the beach.





St. Jacobs - Armenain Town



Stampede Ranch - Bull Rides, Line Dancing, Eating and loads of fun

 
Visit Toronto if you get a chance! It's great fun... Besides... for those woh love New York... You just need to cross Niagara Falls to get to America... with a couple hours worth of driving you'll hit NEW YORK!

Super Basic tips on general song-writing…

For those of you keen on writing songs… I thought I would share some tips on where to start… Each person would write differently – so don’t follow the rules here too strictly. Your style will develop over time…

1.       Find a topic that you can relate to emotionally – if it’s not real to you, it won’t work – usually a life changing event is the greatest to write about – your words will express what others feel but cannot express themselves – and if they can relate the song will grab them. Vulnerability is key.

2.       Write down lines or expressions and words that make that experience come to life and evoke emotions.

3.       Not everything has to rhyme.

4.       Get a great “hook” going… a hook is the part that catches everyone’s attention… usually a riff or the chorus part of a song. I just recorded a song for my album where the chorus is the 2^nd hook. The biggest hook in the song is a vocal doing a repetitive rhythm… “too-doo-too-doo”... it’s incredibly catchy and up-beat.

5.       Decided which tense you are going to write the song in… there are times in which you can change tenses in a song – this works well in story songs. (Country songwriting is genius for this) PAST: “You did me wrong…” change to PRESENT: “Now I wait…” FUTURE/RESOLUTION: “I Will never again…”

6.       Try not to repeat the same words… get a good thesaurus and find a new word – avoid cheesy, predictable lines…  Every line can be expressed in more than one way… eg. “I love how you make me feel” vs. “I delight in how you move me” …

7.       Perspective… Who is telling the story? 1^st person? 3^rd Person? – it is important to keep this person the same way through-out unless you are writing a duet.

8.       Make sure the melody line is easy. If you aren’t a musician – you could always sing it onto your phone and ask a friend to help you work out the chords.

9.       Remember to set the scene in the opening verse (or perhaps opening with the chorus can do that), middle part of the story in your second verse… and close with the chorus or ending of a verse to seal the song and bring closure to the listener.

10.   The Bridge of the song is exactly what it says it is… It bridges main part of the song to introduce the end… It can build up into a key change or build and taper down into a low key chorus which then lifts up again.

11.   Don’t be afraid to have someone crit your songwriting… you are writing for the audience and if they see areas in which you can improve listen with an open mind – try their suggestions… It will grow you as a song-writer – and ill do your character a lot of good!

Hope this helps a little… There are plenty more… but we’ll save those for later…